Accused!

Have you been accused by someone for the things that you have not done? Well im having this kind of problem now. It starts like this, my mother asked me what i've been doing in university and that my reputation was'nt good. Am i having an affair with alot of guys or am i a party girl or what? Man, i was so god damn piss when i heard that. First thing first, whatever im doing is non of their god damn business and secondly what the f$%& are they telling my parents? I mean what did i do to them? I woke up every morning and go to class as usual and if i didnt i will just stay back and online. Oh my god, and i seldom come out from my hole -unless im going out for lunch or so. Maybe they see me going out with too much different guys but wth, do they know that they just drop me by when there are classes or when we have the same class we carpool. Omg,i just cnt stand these kampung people. They see you with a guy then he is ur bf and you can never go out with someone else other than that guy. Wat the f@$&^. Tell mela, what can i do if they cant shut their big mouth? And if i really go out with a guy that often so what is the problem if we are just friends? I have the rights being with friends not only with girls ok. Before this i don't really have guys as friends and my mother accused me of being a lesbian and that i was dating one of my friends who used to stay over. Come on man! Give me a break and if they really believe in me then don't interfere. I can swear to god that i did nothing that will put me in danger and that i did nothing to spoil my reputation. They want to accuse me then so be it! Say some more! Its still not enough bad. Say that im a whore who makes a living sleeping with guys. Say that I smuggle drugs and the "big sister' of the triads. Go on say it! I don't give a damn. I hate being accused and i certainly hate it coming out from my parents. Hire a private investigator and check on me 24/7. Then you will knw what i did throughout the day. Im trying to make a change on the fact that i don't like what im studying now. I want a change and be a better person so please don't give me anymore stupid problems. I just wana finish my studies and get with my life and don't ever tell me what to do as you dont even know what i wanted to do.You still wana see me then don't ever accuse me ever again or else i will not even want to see you again. DONT THINK I DONT DARE!

Now Me!

Tears keep rolling down, hearts swell and emotionally hurt..Why do i still felt so hurt by you? Should i reconsider not being your friend anymore or go on treating u as a friend?So why do i felt that all im doing is on my own will like im minding some1s business?I let go of my pride alot for you already.What else could i do?What more could i do for you friend?Its very sad for me to see you having no directions in life and i really want to help you go through this hard times. Doesnt matter what the outcome is but when you get better already,im afraid i will not be there anymore. All i can do now is just that. Please just held yourself back together and dont do stupid things. My heart sank when you told me how much you wana leave this world. I could still hold on and i will do my very best to do so. But whatever the outcome is, just be it! I will hope the best of you and i will proceed in my dreams and my world.What is meant to be will be, I dont want anymore guesses and dont want anymore stress. Like i said before,'let time heal'. MY wound is still bleeding but i dont feel the pain anymore.If it really bleeds to my death so shall it!

next year will be a year of hope! I want to do something out of the ordinary. I will suceed and i want everyone in this world knows how extraordinary am i. I may not be a straight A student but i knw me. Now my focus is my career n my studies. Build up my empire n build up myself.

denise